Try to Make Amends
by Goober8136
Summary: If anyone deserves to be happy, it is Lisa Cuddy. You're taking her for granted, Thirteen." Goes through the relationship of Cuddy/Thirteen. FEMSLASH...don't like, don't read.
1. Chapter 1

Remy Hadley awoke that morning with a throbbing headache pounding her temples. She slowly rose out of bed and softly planted her feet on the floor. She slowly walked into her bathroom, apprehensive as to whether or not to turn on the light. The sky was pink and soft outside; the mornings never have treated her well. Her hand went to the light switch; she pondered that if she turned on that light, she would have to accept the harsh reality of what her recent night life has inflicted on her. She flipped the switch, and the light immediately flooded her senses. She looked at herself in the mirror and was distraught at the sight before her. _'How could anybody care about me when I look like this?'_ Of course when she thought, "anybody," she meant her boss and former lover, Lisa Cuddy.

She began removing her clothes and turned on the shower. The steam began permeating the room. She stepped in and pulled the curtain. While the steaming hot water caressed and stung her skin, she began reminiscing,

_Remy's feet felt like lead as she slowly made her way to Cuddy's front door. Remy was sporting a pair of long black pants, and a white button down shirt; a black silk vest accentuating her upper body. Her long grey jacket flowed with the chilly wind. Remy exhaled deeply and finally gained the courage to knock on the door. She heard the clicks of Cuddy's shoes on the hardwood in her hallway. With each click, Remy's heart began beating faster and faster. The autumn leaves rustling around her seemed to whisper, 'don't mess this up!' Remy shook the thought from her mind. _

_The door opened and Remy was taken aghast. Lisa Cuddy was wearing a long, black dress that shimmered in the moonlight with a slit up to her left thigh. The dress rose to her bosoms and accentuated every curve. Her hair was pulled up into a loose ponytail, and a diamond necklace was draped elegantly around her neck. Cuddy smiled when she saw Thirteen's expression,_

_"…you look absolutely amazing, Cuddy." Remy said with her eyes as wide as saucers. Cuddy laughed a little and motioned for Thirteen to come in. _

_"I'll just be a second. You can relax on the couch if you'd like." With that, Cuddy disappeared into the hallway. A smile grew on Remy's face as she thought of what this night could bring. She had no idea how she mustered up the courage to ask Cuddy if she may escort the Dean of Medicine to the fiftieth annual fall fundraiser benefit. But whatever pushed her to ask, she couldn't be more thankful._

_Cuddy reappeared with a small black sequined clutch and a dark shawl draped over her shoulders. _

_"Ready to go?" she asked. Thirteen rose to her feet,_

_"Yep, let's go." Thirteen said. _

_The two walked outside and Cuddy turned around to lock her door. Thirteen's eyes went from her car keys to Cuddy's perfectly formed behind. Cuddy placed her keys in her clutch and turned around just in time to see Thirteen's eyes snap up from her ass. A smirk grew across Cuddy's face. A combination of the chilly fall air and pure embarrassment shaded Thirteen's cheeks a light shade of red. Cuddy smiled and said, _

_"It's fine, Thirteen. Everyone has a bizarre fascination with my ass. It's natural." Thirteen smiled like a little boy who had just been kissed on the cheek. She then held out her arm,_

_"May I?" she asked in the best voice she could muster. Cuddy smiled and placed her arm around Thirteen's._

_"Why you most certainly may." With that, the two walked to Thirteen's shiny blue BMW. _

Thirteen shut the shower off and reached around the corner for her towel. She slipped it off the hook and began dabbing the water off of her damp form. She stepped out of the shower and went to her sink. She rubbed off some the condensation and looked at herself again, but this time she was a little more pleased with what she saw. _'At least that's a _start_.'_

She began brushing her teeth. As she was beginning her morning routine, she thought back again to that night three months ago.

_The two arrived at the front entrance of the Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. Thirteen turned the car off and pulled the keys out of the ignition, while the valet on the right side of the car aided Cuddy out of the passenger's seat. Cuddy placed one perfect leg out of the car, and as Thirteen handed her keys to the other valet, she stared at this marvel and could not hide her fascination. Thirteen approached Cuddy and the two walked into the benefit arm in arm. _

_Immediately all eyes were upon them. Some were critical, some were astounded; whether they were astounded by Cuddy's beauty, or choice of escort, neither of them knew, or cared. The room was elegantly decorated, with the nurses' station serving as a bar. The railings of the second floor were draped with strings of silver lights, and the room had a deep red tint in the lighting. Towards the elevators was a dance floor and a small jazz band was playing. The soft jazz echoed through the room and touched Thirteen's ears; she always had a soft spot for jazz. _

_The two were then approached by Foreman, Chase, and Cameron, all of whom were dressed to their best. The crew greeted each other and began laughing. Chase took Cuddy's hand,_

_"Dr. Cuddy, you look absolutely radiant." He smiled._

_"Why thank you, Dr. Chase. You look very handsome yourself." Cuddy smiled. Foreman then commented,_

_"You should have seen Wilson's face when you walked in. He is probably still trying to get the drool off of his suit." _

Thirteen began putting on her jeans and her t shirt. She slowly pulled them past her hips and buttoned them.

_"Where are you guys sitting?" Cameron asked them._

_Thirteen and Cuddy looked at each other,_

_"We don't have a table yet." Thirteen responded._

_"You can come sit with us, we're with Wilson and House. Come on," Chase said. He led the crew over to their table, which was right next to the dance floor. As soon as Thirteen noticed this, she went slightly pale. 'Dancing, there's dancing?' Thirteen asked herself, slightly panicking. Foreman chivalrously pulled Cuddy's seat out for her and she took her seat. Foreman sat next to Chase, and Chase sat next to Cameron. Cuddy then noticed a familiar face sitting directly across from her, House. _

_House's expression was not a particularly greeting one, but Cuddy knew that she could handle him. He was just aggravated that it was not him who brought her here. And frankly, she was glad Thirteen brought her._

Thirteen began putting her long black boots on over the bottoms of her jeans. Then she pulled her grey sweater up over her head.

_After dinner was over, there were a few speeches, and then there was dancing. Thirteen's palms began to sweat. She wondered if Cuddy would like to dance, but couldn't seem to muster up the courage to ask her. 'First date jitters and all I guess,' she told herself. House began talking obnoxiously loud to Wilson, who tried to tame his smart assed remarks._

_'Do you think Cuddy wants to dance?' he asked._

_Thirteen's eyes went to the floor. She suddenly felt inferior to House and felt ashamed that she was too afraid to ask Cuddy. Cuddy noticed this, and then said,_

_"If I wanted to dance, I sure as hell wouldn't dance with you, unless I wanted to go in circles all night." She smirked. House then smiled and replied,_

_"Oh snap, sexy doctor lady with the big ass one, crippled doctor who can only dance in circles, zip." The whole table was entertained by the banter between the two of them, except Thirteen. She took a sip of champagne. Foreman then asked Cameron, _

_"Would you like to dance?" Cameron smiled, leaving Chase speechless._

_"I would love to." The two adjourned on the dance floor and began dancing to the slow jazz of 'Moon River.' Cuddy then turned to Thirteen,_

_"Do you want anything else-" Thirteen then nervously blurted out, _

_"Would you like to dance?" Cuddy was taken aback for a second and then smiled. Thirteen looked horror struck and her pupils grew to the size of tea plates. Cuddy took her hand and said, _

_"I would love to." Thirteen smiled and pulled Cuddy's chair out. Then Cuddy stood and took Thirteen's hand as they walked out together on to the dance floor. Cuddy placed her arm around Thirteen's neck and placed her other hand in Thirteen's. Then, Thirteen placed her hand on the small of Cuddy's back. The two gazed into each other's eyes. Thirteen then smiled, shyly,_

_"Just so you're forewarned, I'm not all that great of a dancer." Cuddy shook her head and smiled. _

_"You don't need to be. Just move with me." Thirteen trusted Cuddy and the glided back and forth on the dance floor. Slow song after slow song, Cuddy's head began resting on Thirteen's shoulder. _

_The night concluded with the two of them being the final pair on the dance floor. Neither noticed, until the clock struck midnight. This stirred Cuddy and Thirteen out of their collective dreams. _

Thirteen poured herself a cup of coffee into her travel mug and then proceeded out the front door. The chilled, winter air stung her cheeks as she made her way to her car. She pulled her keys out of her coat pocket and opened the door. She got in and placed the coffee cup in the center console and turned on the car. She longingly looked at the passenger's seat.

_They arrived in front of Cuddy's house, and Thirteen placed the car into park. Cuddy smiled at her, and Thirteen returned the favor. _

_"Thank you for this, Thirteen. I had a really nice evening." _

_"It was my pleasure, Dr. Cuddy. I think that was the best night I've had in a long time."_

_"It was nice, wasn't it?" The two laughed,_

_"It wouldn't have been half as wonderful if I didn't have you on my arm, Dr. Cuddy."_

_Cuddy was taken aback by this. She was somewhat overthrown by her emotion, and tears threatened to spill down her cheeks. Thirteen got out of the car and made her way to Cuddy's side and opened the door. Cuddy smiled and got out. The two made their way to Cuddy's front door. Cuddy unlocked the door, and turned to say good night to Thirteen. _

_"Good night, Dr. Hadley." Thirteen was somewhat hurt at the sudden tone of professionalism and then shook it off. _

_"Good night, Dr. Cuddy." She said. Then as if some spirit overtook her, she slowly placed her arms around Cuddy's waist. She expected Cuddy to resist slightly, but resistance was nowhere to be found. Thirteen brought her lips to Cuddy's, and both felt a sensation shoot through their bodies. Cuddy wrapped her arms around Thirteen's neck. After seconds of passion, the two separated. _

_"Please, call me Remy." Thirteen said. Cuddy smiled,_

_"Call me Lisa."_

_Both could tell that this was the start of something spectacular._

The sky was gray and dark; too dark for so early in the morning. Another day of snow and rain was sure to await Thirteen. She turned into the parking space and turned off the car. She took a moment to have some final alone time before she had to go in and have the imminent confrontation with Lisa. As she sipped her coffee, she began thinking. She wanted Lisa back. _This mess was all my fault,_ she thought. She kept remembering back on that night. The night it all began. And the night it all fell apart.


	2. Chapter 2

Lisa Cuddy stared at her half empty glass of wine. The deep red liquid seemed to glow against the light of the fireplace. She began wondering what she did to make things turn out so badly. A tear fell from her eye, and fell onto her blanket. She watched the tear droplet bead on the brown fabric of the blanket and then seeped deeper into the blanket's fibers. 'Just like words.' she thought.

Her thoughts were interrupted by her house phone ringing. She allowed the phone to ring on and on until finally the answering machine picked it up. She hoped beyond all hope that it was Remy. No, Remy's pride would never allow her to do that. She waited for the message to play,

"Cuddy, it's Wilson. You didn't look too good when you left work today. Please give me a call, I'm worried about you. Good night." Cuddy placed her glass of wine on the coffee table and then proceeded to her answering machine. She pressed the back button four times, and played a message that had been saved for months. The voice echoed through the empty halls,

"…October fourth, at one thirty four a.m…." the computerized voice informed,

"Lisa, it's me. I think there is some rule about calling like right after the first date or something, not sure if I was supposed to wait a day or what, but…I had an absolutely amazing time with you tonight. You were so beautiful; I couldn't take my eyes off you. That kiss…that kiss made my night. So, sleep well Lisa. I hope you see this going the same place as I do." Remy's voice echoed in Lisa's ears. Her body was shaking with sobs.

She made her way to her bedroom and glanced at the clock, eight thirty p.m. Why did it feel so late? Her house phone rang again. She felt emotionally exhausted and did not want to speak to anyone. She collapsed on her bed and clutched a pillow. The answering machine picked up again,

"Cuddy, it's Wilson again. I'm coming over there to make sure you're okay. Hope you're decent. Be there in ten."

Cuddy didn't hear this. She remained sobbing on the bed, completely unaware that Wilson was on his way to her aide. She got up and walked to the bathroom. She flipped on the light switch, and was saddened again by the damage that she was putting herself through. Her mascara was smudged, her eyeliner was fading. She turned on the faucet and ran her hands under the cold water. She cupped her hands and splashed water on her face, trying to erase the tear stains. She asked herself, 'how can Lisa Cuddy be this distraught over a relationship?' She looked at herself in the mirror. She thought back to what her father would say, 'Shake it off Lis. Better days are comin.' She turned off the faucet and dabbed the moisture off her face. Then a faint sound caught her attention. It sounded like someone coming up her porch.

She gingerly made her way to her front door. She was slightly surprised at Wilson standing in her front doorway. Suddenly, another wave of emotion hit her. She brought her hands to her face to mask the tears falling freely falling from her cheeks. Wilson closed the door behind him and swept the sobbing woman in his arms. She collapsed into his embrace and nuzzled her face in his shoulder. He gently rubbed circles on her back. He tried to soothe her,

"Talk to me, Cuddy. What happened?"

Cuddy separated herself from Wilson. She brushed away the stray tears from her cheeks. She looked him in the eyes,

"I have never really had confidence in any of the relationships I have had. But, for some reason, I thought that this could work." She leaned against the wall and continued,

"I thought and hoped that I wouldn't mess this relationship up. Remy and I had something, you know? But then all of the sudden it seemed like she just became an insensitive stranger."

Wilson stared at her with concern in his eyes,

"Cuddy that was not your fault in any way. You're forgetting that Re-Dr. Hadley is dying. Maybe she is just reacting to the reality of her situation."

"We have already talked about that-"

"Maybe she was only thinking about the short term."

"I know her, Wilson. Better than anyone. She doesn't beat around the bush. If she was scared she would have said so. This was just so…unlike her."

"She may have been putting up a façade around you, Cuddy. She used you, Cuddy."

Cuddy began getting irritated. She refused to believe that her Remy would use her like that. She walked past Wilson and opened the front door. Wilson looked at Cuddy, crestfallen.

"I have never seen you like this. In all the years I have known you; I have never seen you so upset. You did not mess your relationship up with Thirteen."

Cuddy slammed the front door shut.

"I messed it up. I messed my relationship up, I messed my job up, I messed up my pregnancy."

Wilson began to rebuild his defense. He slowly walked to Cuddy,

"So that's what this is about? You think you messed everything up? You could not help your miscarriage, those were just physical events. You need to accept the fact that it was not you who messed up, or who was even in control of that relationship. And your job? No one else can ever do your job with the efficiency and the skill that you execute it with. Cuddy, don't let yourself think that you have failed or messed up anything."

Cuddy stared at the floorboards, tears falling. Wilson slowly walked passed Cuddy, and gently placed a kiss on her forehead. Wilson walked out and gently shut the door. Cuddy stood in the front hallway; Wilson's words echoing in her mind. She shouldn't let this relationship damage her the way it has. She slowly walked back to her bedroom and shut the door.


	3. Chapter 3

Remy made her way into the Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. She was greeted by a few of the nurses, bidding her a good morning and whatnot. She gingerly walked past the clinic, fully aware that Lisa may or may not be there. She kept kicking herself, frustrated at her overwhelming sense of pride that prevented her from going in there and begging for Lisa to come back to her. She waited so long just to ask her to that benefit…

She made her way to the elevator and was surprised to see House sitting in wheelchair in the middle of the elevator. House gave her a smug smile and moved back to allow her some room. The elevator doors slowly closed. House then began conversation in his usual sarcastic tone,

"No kiss from Cuddy this morning?" Thirteen just ignored his question. There was a brief hiatus of silence. Then Thirteen asked,

"Why the wheelchair?"

"I need my parking space back. New doctor in the oncology lab is all up on my jock. She has the space thirty four feet from the door. My space now is about fifty four feet away. That is entirely too much. She has horsepower on that chair for a reason."

There was another pause in the conversation. Then House replied in a more serious tone,

"She's miserable, you know." Thirteen merely stared at House, whose eyes were focused on the increasing numbers on the panel above the elevator door.

"What makes you say that?" Thirteen asked. Then the elevator door opened.

"Ask Cameron." With that he wheeled out of the elevator leaving a stunned Thirteen.

Thirteen went down to the emergency room and searched around for a familiar face. Her eyes then focused upon the blonde and she made her way over to her. Cameron was just finishing some minor stitches and removed her gloves. The small boy who she had just tended to smiled and made his way over to his mom. Cameron made her way over to Thirteen.

"Hey, what's going on?" Cameron asked Thirteen.

"I was wondering if you could tell me about Lisa. You know, how she's doing." Thirteen inquired.

"Are you hungry?" Cameron asked.

"It's only ten o clock." Thirteen said.

"Then let's grab some coffee."

The cafeteria was relatively empty, minus a few doctors and nurses here and there. Cameron and Thirteen were sitting at a table by the wall. Thirteen was staring at her cup of coffee.

"She is really upset. She was tossing around the words 'used' and 'played' and other not so endearing terms." Cameron said.

"What exactly did she say?"

Cameron looked at Thirteen with concern in her eyes.

_Cameron made her way to Cuddy's office that Thursday evening with the final report on the young girl with Sickle Cell Anemia. She noticed through the window that Cuddy was on her couch, but it was not until she entered the room that her heart broke. _

_She opened the door and saw Cuddy's tear stained face. Once Cuddy noticed Cameron was in the room, she tried to wipe some of her tears away from her cheeks. Cameron quietly shut the door behind her and placed the folder on the coffee table. She then took a seat next to Cuddy and took her hand. Cuddy resisted slightly at first, but then she saw the concern in Cameron's eyes. _

_"You need to talk?" Cameron asked. Cuddy did not immediately respond. She kept staring at her knees and the bunched up tissue in her hand. Cuddy began to speak with a raspy voice,_

_"I thought I meant more to her than that, you know? I thought that all the things she said, weren't just hollow words to her." Tears began streaming from Cuddy's eyes. _

_"I didn't mean it when I called her insensitive. I didn't mean all that I said, but she just was so angry with me. I didn't know why. It was my fault." _

_Cameron stared at the floor,_

_"Cuddy in all the years I have known you, I have never seen you like this. I'm sure she had a good reason for what she said."_

_Cuddy withdrew her hand from Cameron's. She brushed her tears from her cheeks,_

_"I'm sorry I unloaded that on you. I have work to do." Cuddy rose from her couch and brushed out the wrinkles in her skirt. She then proceeded to leave her office, but stopped short and looked at the ground,_

_"Can you not tell anyone that you saw me like this?" Cameron exhaled deeply,_

_"You have my word." _

_Cuddy nodded and proceeded into the Clinic._

"She's really hurting right now, Remy. You need to talk to her. And you need to talk about what happened. Why did you do what you did?"

Thirteen stared at her coffee,

"None of this was her fault. This was all my fault."

"So what happened?"

Tears began to form in Thirteen's eyes. She began picking at her coffee cup,

"You have a while?"

Cameron nodded and gave a small, comforting smile. Thirteen began….


	4. Chapter 4

Thirteen mentally cursed herself as she prepared to share the story with Cameron. She knew that this was all her fault, but in the back of her mind, she believed that Cameron could soothe the rift between her and Cuddy. Maybe Thirteen herself would not have to go to Cuddy; maybe Cuddy would come to her. That may be a little bit easier.

Thirteen exhaled deeply and began the tale which cut her deeper and deeper every time she thought about it.

_Five months of unrequited bliss. That is what she and Lisa had... until that fateful night. Thirteen knew she should not have answered her cell phone that night. Thirteen was driving through suburban New Jersey on her way home from work that afternoon. This Valentine's Day, she would tell Lisa how she really felt. Suddenly, she felt excited and nervous She took in the sight of the sun setting over the trees.. She felt like she could drive right into the pools of blue, orange and crimson. She heard her phone ring and began digging around her cup holder while trying to keep here eyes on the road. Her hand grazed the metallic device and hurriedly flipped it open. She held the phone to her ear, expecting Lisa's voice on the other end._

_"Hello?" she said in a semi sappy tone._

_"Rem! What's going on, vicious?" it took her a second to register whom the voice belonged to. She knew for sure it wasn't Lisa's._

_"Jetta? Hey, how've you been?" Jetta was a friend of Thirteen's who always seemed to get her into trouble. Her voice was sultry and deep; a voice that any woman, or man, could fall for. It was widely known that Jetta had always had a crush on Thirteen._

_"A bunch of us were in the city and we were wondering if you'd wanna come by and have some drinks with us!" _

_"I'd like to but I promised my girlfriend that she and I could go out to dinner tonight. She kind of had a rough day, and-"_

_"Come on, babe. You've spent every waking moment with her since you two got together. Come out and jam out, girl. We'll be at the Tryst at around ten. It's six now, you could probably have dinner and book!"_

_Thirteen shook her head. _

_"I can't do that to her."_

_"Bring her along!"_

_Thirteen considered the thought a moment,_

_"You said ten, right? You have a D.D.?" _

_"Yup. We're all putting money in and staying in a hotel. You could be back in town by the time you have to get to work."_

_Thirteen bit her lip. She knew what she should do and she began considering._

_"I'll think about it." Then she flipped the phone shut._

_Thirteen began tapping the wheel nervously. She knew that it would take a while to get to the city. Hell, she had been feeling pretty suffocated lately anyway. She began dialing the number that seemed to be second nature to her fingers. She put the phone to her ear and counted the dial tones until she heard the voice that melted her,_

_"Dr. Cuddy?"_

_"Hey" Thirteen smiled._

_"Hey, you almost here?" Lisa asked._

_"I'm on my way home. Hey, I'm not feeling all that well tonight, can I have a rain check on dinner?" Thirteen winced as she lied to Lisa. She never lied to Lisa. Especially not on Valentine's day._

_"But…it's Valentine's Day. Are you sure?" Thirteen felt a sharp pang to her heart when she heard the hurt and disappointment in Lisa's voice._

_"I've just feel kind of feverish and I'm kind of nauseous." She was careful in the symptoms she chose; ensuring that Lisa wouldn't believe it was the Huntington's._

_"Okay. Do you want me to come over?"_

_"Nuh-no, that's fine. I don't want to expose you to this if it's something contagious."_

_"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow then, if you're feeling okay."_

_"I'm sorry Lis, I really am. I'll make it up to you I swear."_

_"I just want you to recuperate. Give me a call if you need anything."_

_"I love you." _

_"…love you too." Thirteen's heart sank when she heard the pause in Lisa's voice. What was she doing?_

_Thirteen pulled into her driveway, and turned off the car. She sat in the car a few moments; trying to convince herself that this wasn't a big deal. She would go to the club, have a drink or two, have fun with her friends, and then she would leave and be back for work in the morning. But it was Valentine's Day. 'What the hell, it's just a novelty holiday anyway.' she told herself, all the while knowing that her decision was unfair to Lisa._

_She pulled the keys out of the ignition and got out of the car. She went into the house and began thinking about what she was going to wear to the Tryst that night._

_It was nine o' clock, and Thirteen was decked out to the T's. She was wearing a pair of skinny jeans tucked into a pair of knee high black leather boots. She had a grey tank top beneath a black, short sleeved sweater; low cut, with a silver necklace tucked neatly beneath her chest. She made her way to her car._

_Cuddy sat on the couch in her living room, watching "No Reservations." She stared at the phone, and considered calling Remy. It's only nine o' clock…she's probably asleep though. Cuddy picked up her phone and dialed the familiar number that she seemed to constantly dial nowadays. She was serenaded by a long string of dial tones……_

_Thirteen picked up her cell phone and looked at the caller I.D. She pulled up in front of Jetta's house. She hesitated as to whether or not too flip open the phone. She decided that it would be best to just convince Lisa that she was asleep. Jetta and Thirteen's other friend, Mia, Climbed into the back seat…_

_Cuddy placed the phone back down on the coffee table. She just stared at the phone a moment, and figured that Remy had fallen asleep. Cuddy got up and made her way to the kitchen._

_The trio arrived at the Tryst with minutes to spare. They made their way to the door, flashed their I.D.'s to the bouncers, and proceeded to go in. Thirteen allowed Jetta to take the lead and she led them to the bar where all their friends were standing. Thirteen noticed some familiar faces, some not so familiar faces. Jetta motioned for a round of drinks for the crew. Thirteen struck up conversation with some of her old friends. The glasses were spread around the crew, and immediately, the lights, and the alcohol became an intoxicating force to her heightened senses._

_Through out the night, Thirteen consumed another drink and another. She tended to her drink and stared at herself in the mirror behind the bar. 'I shouldn't be here…I should be with her…' she thought over and over. _

_Jetta came off of the dance floor and began eyeing up Thirteen. Jetta took the seat next to Thirteen and immediately began toying with the hem on Thirteen's sweater. Thirteen pulled away slightly and started to get agitated. _

_"Jet, please, cool out." Thirteen sighed._

_"Come and dance with me, please." Jetta asked in a flirtatious manner. Jetta began toying with the chain around Thirteen's neck. Jetta slightly leaned over and whispered in her ear,_

_"Relax, Rem. You're with me." Thirteen's defenses fell. She allowed herself to succumb to the heat of the moment. Her hand grazed Jetta's breast as she reached for the small of Jetta's back. Jetta smiled and led Thirteen to the dance floor by her chain. _

_Slowly at first, Thirteen began to align her hips with Jetta's allowing them to gyrate with the music. The feel of Jetta's body enticed her. As the music grew louder, so did the heart beat in Thirteen's ears. The night played on, and the final song serenaded the pumped crowd…minus Thirteen and Jetta._

_Thirteen awoke the next morning in a haze. She was surrounded by a room that was unfamiliar to her. She propped herself on her elbows and took in her surroundings. She saw a brazier strewn on the television, a skirt on the bed stand, and panties on the closet handle. Thirteen brought her hand to her face. Her hand reeked of sweat and alcohol. She glanced at the clock next to her bed, 6:26 A.M. She brushed her hand through her hair. This movement stirred the topless sleeping dark haired woman next to her…Jetta. Her deep brown eyes looked up at Thirteen and gave her a sultry smile. Thirteen shot her an angered look of disgust and shot up out of bed. Thirteen began redressing herself. She was the only one of the two who was wearing their underwear. Jetta wrapped the blanket around her naked figure,_

_"Baby, come back to bed. Call in sick today, for me?" Jetta pleaded, playfully. Thirteen laughed,_

_"Not a chance. You were semi sober last night. You knew I wasn't. I have nothing to say to you. I don't want to even be in the same room as you right now." Thirteen stammered through clenched teeth. She grabbed her car keys and headed out the door, leaving a speechless Jetta._

_Thirteen managed to get a cab to her car that was parked in the alley behind the Tryst. She paid the driver and emerged from the cab. She noticed the condensation from the early morning dew on her windshield. The dew glazed the blue car with a shimmer; reminding her of the shimmer in Lisa's eyes. Thirteen's heart sank…Lisa._

_Thirteen unlocked the car and got in. She turned the heater on and allowed the windows to de-fog. She took her cell phone out of the cup holder, the screen lit up; four missed calls, all from Lisa. 'What did I just do?' she thought. She shook her head, put the car into drive and pulled out of the alley. _

Cameron stared in shock at Thirteen. Thirteen became aggravated at Cameron's expression.

"You could say something." Thirteen sighed.

"You cheated on Cuddy. What do you expect me to say?" Cameron's voice elevated slightly. Thirteen was shocked at the sudden anger in Cameron's voice.

"…I'll continue." Thirteen stated.


	5. Chapter 5

Thirteen sat back down with another cup of coffee. As soon as she sat down, Cameron eyes refocused on Thirteen. She was intent on hearing the rest of the story.

_Thirteen allowed herself little time to finish the rest of her coffee. She was seated at the break room table, staring out the window at the snow falling, flake by flake. Her guilt was becoming crippling, and she hadn't even seen Lisa at all today. In her subconscious, she knew that she was avoiding Lisa. Foreman and Kutner walked into the break room, discussing the latest developments in his "internet diagnosis" site. Kutner took a seat next to Thirteen and suddenly felt very awkward. She didn't even acknowledge the fact that to two had just entered the room. Kutner and Foreman exchanged confused glances,_

_"Late night?" Foreman asked. He motioned to her somewhat disheveled hair that was thrown up in a loose bun, and the appearance that she had slept in the clothes she was wearing. Thirteen did not respond, her eyes remained focused on every single snowflake that fell. _

_Kutner nudged her a bit to try to snap her out of her daze. She started slightly and then greeted the two. Foreman shrugged,_

_"Did you have a late night last night?" Foreman asked again._

_Thirteen nodded slightly,_

_"Kind of."_

_Kutner smiled at her,_

_"Hey, I heard you were chillin' at the Tryst last night." he smirked._

_Thirteen's eyes turned to tea saucers. House walked into the break room and poured himself a cup of coffee. He tuned his ears to the conversation. _

_"Ten bucks to the kiddies who take my place at clinic duty today." Foreman and Kutner shook their heads, Kutner continued,_

_"Kumar said he saw you and Jetta getting tight on the dance floor last night." Thirteen shook her head,_

_"We were not getting tight on the dance floor. I was home sick-"_

_House immediately became intent on hearing more of this conversation. A small flame grew in House's gut. He sensed that something was rotten in the state of Dr. Hadley. _

_"He said you were there with Mariah and Jetta and Mia, you sure you weren't there?"_

_Thirteen sighed. She figured that no one really knew about her and Cuddy's relationship._

_"I went out and had a few drinks with them, it was nothing." she sighed._

_"Kumar said you left with Jetta." Thirteen shot Kutner an angry look. Suddenly, Thirteen became very defensive._

_"What I did or didn't do last night is no one's business except mine." Thirteen stood up and left the break room, leaving a confused Kutner and Foreman in her wake. House stared at her as she left, putting the pieces together. _

_Thirteen stepped off the elevator on the first floor and brushed into the clinic. She peered into the window of Cuddy's office. Lisa was sitting at her desk sipping her tea and flipping through a file. Thirteen's heart sank; she looked so sweet, so innocent. Thirteen immediately considered telling Lisa the truth. But she soon realized, not a good idea._

_Thirteen walked into Lisa's office, and immediately, Lisa beamed. She stood up and made her way to Thirteen. Thirteen shut the doors behind her, flipped the blinds, and then swept Lisa up in her arms and planted a passionate kiss upon her lips. Her hands wandered around Lisa's back, wanting her, pulling Lisa deeper into her embrace. Thirteen released Lisa, and rested her forehead on Lisa's. Lisa smile was brighter than ever,_

_"It's good to see you're feeling better." _

_Thirteen smiled back at her,_

_"I'm sorry about that, Lis. Can we go out tonight? I'll take you to Donatello's, we'll have drinks and dance." _

_Lisa placed a small kiss on Thirteen's lips,_

_"Meet me here after you get off?"_

_Thirteen nodded, her smile fell slightly. Lisa turned her head to the side,_

_"Are you okay?"_

_Thirteen nodded again, _

_"Yeah. I'll meet you tonight, okay?"_

_Lisa smiled and kissed her, Thirteen released her from her protective embrace. Lisa went back to her desk and resumed her work. Thirteen stepped out of Lisa's office and pulled the doors closed behind her and tilted her head against the door. She took a cleansing breath and then turned around; proceeding into the clinic. Her eyes were fixed toward the floor, her hands behind her back. Her thoughts were interrupted by House, sitting in on of the clinic chairs, his cane hanging from the armrest of the chair, face hidden behind People magazine. As Thirteen brushed by, House revealed his critical eyes. _

_"In my expert opinion, alcohol is the absolute best cure for a fever and nausea." _

_Thirteen halted in her tracks,_

_"How'd you-"_

_House threw the magazine on the seat next to him and rose to his feet. _

_"Cuddy called me in concern last night, asking if nausea and a fever is a side symptom of Huntington's. And if you're curious, than yes, I am fully aware of your relationship with Lisa Cuddy."_

_Thirteen stood aback in shock. _

_"She told you? Why w-" _

_"I managed to piece it together after five months. Most people believed that you were a mere escort to a benefit. Now Cuddy escorts you to her own little 'benefits.'"_

_House pulled Thirteen out into the lobby of the Princeton-Plainsboro Hospital. He pulled her to the elevator. She began getting nervous, and sensed a confrontation._

_"This is my business and Lisa's. Not yours, House."_

_"You gonna tell her that you were in a lip lock with another woman who didn't even vaguely resemble Cuddy?"_

_Thirteen stared into House's blue eyes with anger._

_"Like I said, none of your damn business."_

_"In the past few months, Lisa Cuddy has gone through a loss. She lost the one thing that she wanted more than wasted sex with one of her employees; she wanted one of those damn parasites who could grow up and call her 'Momma.' When she lost that, she was devastated; god knows why,"_

_Guilt began weighing heavy on Thirteen's heart._

_"…then you came along, giving her something else to think about besides how she failed at the one thing she should be genetically wired to do. You were spouting off this crap about love and trust, and then you go behind her back and betray that trust."_

_Thirteen sighed,_

_"Where the hell is this coming from? You are the coldest bastard in this damn hospital, and now all of the sudden you stick up for a woman who you insult everyday?" _

_House couldn't believe what was coming from Thirteen's mouth,_

_"Ah, the good old reversing the criticism so you don't have to hear it. I used to believe that you would take care of her." Thirteen became surprised at the concern in House's voice._

_"…my mistake." The elevator doors opened and House stepped in. House sighed and a look of genuine concern was across his rugged features. Thirteen's eyes met House's. House gave a final word,_

_"If anyone deserves to be happy, it is Lisa Cuddy. You're taking her for granted, Thirteen." With that, the elevator doors closed._

"I never thought I'd say this, but I think he was right." Cameron said. The conversation was interrupted by Cameron's pager going off. Cameron glanced at her pager and stood up.

"I've got to go, we've been here for two hours, I think you better head back upstairs."

Thirteen stood up as well.

"Thanks for listening." Thirteen smiled.

Cameron nodded in reassurance and headed to the emergency room. Thirteen sat back down. She began thinking, again. Thinking; the very thing that was causing her heart to stop. Suddenly it dawned on her; she knew exactly what she had to do, what she wanted to do. She got up and made her way upstairs.


	6. Chapter 6

Lisa Cuddy sat behind her desk snapping a rubber band between her fingers. Her eyes were fixed on the mahogany table across from her desk; for no reason in particular. She felt exhausted from accepting the majority of the cases in the clinic. There hadn't been a serious case in days that would require her to go up to the second floor; that was a very good thing. The longer she put off going upstairs, the heavier her heart became. She suddenly snapped out of her daze, and glanced at the clock on her desk: 5:30 P.M. Maybe she left already? Cuddy stood up and smoothed the pleats out of her black skirt. She began gathering her things off of her desk. She piled some folders and tucked them away neatly in her briefcase. The light outside of her window was growing purple and soft. She was all ready to leave for the night when there was a knock at her office door.

"Come in." she called.

On the other side of the door stood Wilson, somewhat damp from the snow outside. His grey jacket had dark spots from the melted precipitation. He looked somewhat pathetic; Cuddy laughed a little and motioned for him to sit down.

"Why aren't you going home?" Cuddy asked laughing slightly.

A wide grin grew across Wilson's face.

"You know I haven't heard that laugh in a while."

Cuddy's face drew a confused expression,

"What?"

"You're smiling. That means you're making progress."

"Don't push it, Wilson." she smirked.

"My car won't start. I was wondering if I could call a truck from your office. My cell's water logged."

Cuddy nodded and motioned to the phone. Cuddy took a seat next to Wilson. Wilson didn't go to the phone, but his eyes remained intent on Cuddy. Cuddy eyes remained on her shoes. She tried to avoid eye contact with Wilson. Wilson then began probing,

"You have spent every second you are here working in the clinic. You need to get this weight off your shoulders. Actually talk. If not to me, then someone who you trust."

"If I open up, then I have to accept what happened. I don't want to do that right now." Cuddy put up a wall of reservation. Wilson dug deeper,

"Which hurts you more, the fact that you lost that baby or the prospect of losing her?" Cuddy's eyes narrowed. Her mouth was ajar as though Wilson had just delivered a painful blow to her heart. She backed away slightly and stood up.

"This is none of your damn business. Besides, don't you have a tow truck to call?" Wilson proceeded cautiously.

"The truck can wait. I know that once you talk about what happened, the tension will loosen. You may be able to face her."

Cuddy shook her head. She began pacing in circles. Her crestfallen demeanor was wearing thin, and finally, she caved in.

"Something had changed…" she began to sob.

_ Cuddy began her rounds at the clinic, glancing out the window every now and then to make sure that she didn't miss Remy coming in. She felt miserable that she couldn't take care of her last night, and hoped that Rem was feeling better that morning. Various clinic patients came and went, a sore throat here, a runny nose there, and object stuck in some orifice of a five year old, the usual things. _

_She glanced at the clock again, ten fifteen; perhaps she was still too sick to come in? Cuddy made a mental note to call her at the first available break she had. Cuddy's thoughts were interrupted by a short tempered House, who was complaining that this was his fourth consecutive day of clinic duty. House hobbled past the registration desk to the woman who seemed to be staring out the clinic window into the hospital lobby._

_"You know if you watch for her long enough, you might just be able to make her magically appear."_

_Cuddy shook her head and smiled,_

_"I don't know what you're talking about." House merely shrugged his shoulders and smirked sarcastically,_

_"Clearly you do not watch the latest adaptation of the L Word, called the D word, "d" meaning desperate, or doctor."_

_Cuddy merely glanced out the window again and continued through her cases. _

_"She might not be coming in today, she was feeling _

_House stared at her a while. Her outfit seemed more sultry than usual. Her hips were accentuated by flowing black skirt that seemed to follow a current with Cuddy's every move. The skirt gently complimented her red shirt that hugged her waist and the plunging neckline accentuated her perfectly formed breasts, the sleeves cut off just below her shoulder. Why was she trying so hard? Trouble in the relationship? House cleared his throat and called across the clinic, _

_"By the way, Wonder Lover Woman is upstairs. You just missed her." _

_Cuddy turned around and stared at House as his grey blazer limped out of the clinic, leaving her somewhat confused. She began wondering why Remy had come in and hadn't even greeted her. Somewhat hurt, she continued on to her next case. _

"I didn't even notice then that something had changed. But I will admit, that kiss felt different. There was some much behind it, and I couldn't figure out what it was."

Wilson sighed,

"You wouldn't have known. How could you?"

Wilson stood up and pulled his car keys out of his pocket.

"I'm gonna head home. If you need me, you call me, okay?" Wilson ordered.

Cuddy smirked,

"How are you going to get home if your car isn't starting? And shouldn't call, considering your cell is water logged."

A sheepish grin spread across Wilson's face. Cuddy could read his expression as, 'busted.' With that, Wilson headed out of Cuddy's office.

Cuddy took a breath of relief. She felt a wave of clarity fall across her, and she felt a sense of optimism. She didn't need Remy…_Dr. Hadley_. She would look past this, and she would cope with this. She smiled and put on her coat, took her briefcase and turned out the lights.

The elevator door opened and Thirteen ran out towards the clinic. The door was locked, and Cuddy's office was dark. Cuddy pulled out of the parking lot and headed home. Little did she know that Thirteen had missed her by mere seconds…


	7. Chapter 7

Thirteen lay in her bed that night, surrounded by darkness. The blankets that were in contact with her skin felt as though they were suffocating her. She tossed and turned, trying to feel some sense of comfort again. She quickly tossed the covers off of her body and planted her feet on the ground. The cold hardwood sent a cold sensation up her legs that felt like little knives cutting into the soles of her feet. She slowly rose from her bed and began making her way towards her kitchen. Along the way, she paused, staring at her cell phone sitting in a dish on the table in her living room. She contemplated dialing her number; the number she had been longing to dial for the past week. She stared at the phone; seeing her reflection in the screen. She picked the phone up and flipped it open.

She began dialing a number, but then quickly snapped the phone shut. She threw the phone back into the dish; the echo of the phone hitting the ceramic dish echoed throughout her apartment.

As she entered her kitchen, the bright green light of the clock on her stove reminded her of the hours left until she had to go to work. It was only three thirty in the morning; which meant she had three more hours until she needed to wake up for work. Thirteen opened her refrigerator and pulled out a chilled bottle of Arbor Mist. She slammed the door shut behind her and reached into the shelf to pull out a glass. She filled the glass half full with the 'liquid comfort,' and she took the glass to her couch. She sank into the cushions, sipping on the fruity tasting spirit. Her mind began racing.

_The three days that had passed since the 'Jetta affair,' as it had come to be known, felt like an eternity to Thirteen, who had been avoiding Lisa as much as possible. She stepped off the elevator and began making her way towards the break room where Kutner, House, Taub, and Foreman were congregated. Thirteen could tell by the expressions on their faces that House was on another one of his infamous tirades. But she noticed he wasn't talking, he was listening; intently. As she got closer to the door, she saw a dark haired woman sitting next to Kutner. Kutner seemed engaged in conversation with her; as though he was speaking to an old friend. Thirteen entered the room, and immediately her heart sank. She saw the angered expression on House's face, and then her eyes met with the mysterious dark haired woman who had captured everyone's attention…Jetta. She turned and gave a smug smirk to Thirteen,_

_"Oh hey, babe. I was just telling the guys here about our little rendezvous at the Tryst the other night. Did you know Kumar was there?" Thirteen looked at Jetta with a horrified expression. Thirteen spoke through clenched teeth,_

_"…Jetta, can I speak to you a moment?" _


	8. Chapter 8

_

* * *

"Jetta…can I speak to you a moment?" _

_Jetta rose to her feet and smiled at the other gentlemen in the break room and followed Thirteen out into the hallway. House leaned against the counter and observed the conversation between the two women. As the conversation progressed, Thirteen's motions became more eccentric, and Jetta seemed to become all the more flirtatious. Kutner and Taub exchanged glances,_

_"Jetta and Thirteen, together at last," Kutner smirked._

_"…I never thought I'd see the day." _

_House, speechless, removed himself from the break room and proceeded into his office._

_Thirteen grew more and more agitated as their conversation went on,_

_"What the in the hell are you doing here, Jetta? I thought I told you specifically to stay away from me from now on."_

_Jetta began playing with the lapels of Thirteen's medical jacket and smiled,_

_"I thought you were just saying that because you were hung over and aren't really much of a morning person." Jetta giggled._

_Thirteen took a firm grip to Jetta's wrists and removed them from her coat,_

_"So you think this is funny? You find humor in the fact that you could damage my career and my relationship by being here."_

_House began making his way outside; attempting to make get to Wilson's office. He observed the situation in the hall for a few more seconds, and the turned on his heels in the opposite direction. He froze in his tracks when he saw what was coming down the hall…_

_"No I don't think it's funny. I'm just trying to show you that I can be supportive. I thought maybe you and I could go out for lunch or something." Jetta spoke; leaning against the wall._

_"Jetta, this ends here. It should have ended back at the hotel. But you, being the woman you are, just couldn't let it go. One night stand just has no connotation with you, does it?"_

_House saw Cuddy, greeting the nurses and patients as they passed her in the hallway. As her heels clicked closer and closer, his heart began beating faster and faster. He did not want her to see what was going on , no matter how much of a cold bastard he was. _

_Lisa caught sight of Thirteen and began making her way towards her, but then she took in the sight of the woman whom she was speaking to. Lisa took a stance beside House; listening to the scene unfold._

_"Please, just leave, Jetta. If you really care about me the way you say you do, then please just leave. I can't let Lisa find out what happened." Thirteen sighed._

_Just beyond Thirteen's shoulder, a stricken expression began to grow on Lisa's face._

_"What makes you think that your relationship with her isn't over? You lied to her and you cheated on her. Imagine what she's gonna say when she finds out." Jetta muttered._

_"She doesn't have to find out. It was a mistake. Leave it at that." Thirteen muttered through clenched teeth. Jetta merely sighed; she kissed her middle and index finger and gently placed them upon Thirteen's lips. In anger, Thirteen pulled away. Jetta smiled and made her way to the crowded elevator; disappearing among the people. Thirteen sighed and turned on her heels to begin her rounds; she then caught sight of House staring at her with a hateful fire in his eyes, and his hand on Lisa's arm. Lisa stood with her jaw unhinged and tears streaming down her face._

_Thirteen's façade melted and her heart sank. House cleared his throat,_

_"I'll take the rounds today. Looks like you're gonna be a little side tracked." he spoke in a serious tone then hobbled down the hallway. As he passed, Lisa's eyes fell from Thirteen to the floor. Thirteen went to her; stricken speechless,_

_"L-Lis…I'm s-"_

_Lisa's tearful eyes met Thirteen's,_

_"When did this happen?" she spoke in as strong of a tone as she could muster. Thirteen sighed; realizing that lying would only further the problem,_

_"Valentine's Day. I went to the Tryst and met up with Jetta. We had drinks, and ended up in a hotel room." With every word she spoke, Lisa's heart broke even further. Lisa closed her eyes; tears seeping down her cheeks. Lisa remained speechless, and she turned and began walking at a fast pace down the hallway. Thirteen called after her,_

_"Lisa…Lisa!" _

_Thirteen hurried down the hallway; Lisa's pace didn't falter,_

_"Lisa, please say something to me, please. Tell me what you're thinking." Thirteen cried, on the verge of tears. Lisa stopped and quickly turned to Thirteen,_

_"You know what I'm thinking right now?..." her voice breaking with sobs, threatening to take over her body,_

_"…I'm thinking that I can't be with someone who is willing to cheat on me, hide it, and lie. I'm done, Remy." Lisa turned and continued down the hallway. Thirteen stared after her; tears streaming down her face._

Thirteen winced as she took a deep swig of the auburn liquid. She stared at the phone; time and time again she wanted to call Lisa. Maybe tomorrow…maybe tomorrow she could muster up the courage to apologize. Thirteen swallowed that last ounce of the alcohol, and placed the glass on her coffee table. She reached across the couch a turned out the light; she stared at the fire which slowly died out. As the embers glowed, her eyelids grew heavier and heavier until she slowly drifted off to sleep.

* * *

This chapter was the real chapter eight! Sorry about all the confusion and long breaks. I'm gonna go back once the story is further along and I'm gonna add more detail to this chapter!


	9. Chapter 9

Generally, when a patient arrives and is admitted into the care of the Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, they have been stricken with some debilitating illness that has caused their lives to come to disarray, and are seeking the aide of the team of knowledgeable doctors who's intelligence and diagnostic abilities have exemplified the very best the nation had to offer. This woman on the other hand, had no intentions of even being taken there in the first place. She was just afflicted with the rotten luck of living close enough to the PPTH to which the paramedics decided it was the fastest and safest place to treat her. She was well aware of the knowledge that she was dying; when one's disease wracks damage on a body like the disease that plagued her body, one begins to understand the end was sooner rather than later.

Her temperament from the moment she had arrived through the doors was one of instability. She refused to tell any of the personnel her very name; one who bore witness to her unhopeful demeanor would tend to see her as a helpless old lethargic who was brought in to make the world miserable on her dying days.

The doctors who worked under Gregory House were given the esteemed privilege of having to care for the woman, who, at first, was labeled, 'Patient X', but through biographical analysis of medical history and fingerprints was later deemed her birth name, Lena Elderhardt.

It was a well known fact that the doctors would draw straws to determine who would have the major inconvenience of taking care of Lena that day. On that late, rainy afternoon, Thirteen drew the short straw.

She silently sulked down the hallway, the obvious weight of her current situation bearing down on her like a hail storm. She made her way to the nurses' station to pick up Lena's chart, and then turned around to face 'Lena's Den,' as it had been referred. Thirteen stared a moment at the patient through the thick glass sliding door. She was slightly surprised at how young and innocent Lena looked. A stranger may have not even guessed that she was afflicted with an illness. Age had been fair to Lena's face; her eyes were still a deep and fiery shade of green, her cheeks were smooth and fair shade of pink. The wavy locks of her golden touched brown hair fell over her shoulders and cascaded to her bosom. Thirteen took a second glance at her chart,

her age stated that she was fifty six years old. Her eyes returned to the woman in the bed, _'there's no way in hell she is almost sixty.' _Thirteen brought her eyes back to the chart skimming further down the page. She had no children, was divorced, and no one had come to visit her. _No wonder she was so angry. _Lena was diagnosed with terminal ovarian cancer. Thirteen braced herself for the woman's wrath and stepped inside her room.

Lena's eyes went from the television to Thirteen as she made her way to the opposite side of Lena's bed. Thirteen tried to avoid conversation with the woman, and began checking the various machines that Lena had been hooked up to. Lena smiled slightly, simply because she could sense Thirteen's nervousness. Lena spoke quietly,

"You know, you're the first one who actually had the common sense not to try to cheer me up at this place."

Thirteen kept her eyes fixed on the EKG machine,

"I've heard that you're not one for light conversation." she replied.

Lena stared at Thirteen while she made her way to the right side of Lena's bed; checking the various IV's and jotting down information. She began taking in small observations; Thirteen's sagging shoulders, her weak sense of pride when she walked, her stylish yet masculine clothes.

"Looks like I'm not the only one in this room with a problem." Lena asked with a deep, somewhat southern lilt in her voice.

Thirteen paused slightly,

"Excuse me?" she asked. Lena stared into her eyes in an examining fashion.

"You've got woman troubles." Lena blatently stated.

Thirteen was slightly taken aback,

"I have w- excuse me? Where is this coming from?" Thirteen asked.

"It's coming from a woman who is in this hospital alone because she has had endless strings of woman problems." At this comment, Thirteen suddenly became fascinated with Lena.

"How could you possibly know that?" Thirteen probed.

"I've been there, honey. I know. In fact, sit down, and maybe I'll be able to shed a little light on this for you."

Thirteen stared at Lena in disbelief for a moment, and then slowly took a seat.

* * *

Hey! Sorry about my hiatus. I've been wracking my brain trying to continue! If anyone has an ideas, send 'em to me! Lena is going to play a key role in the whole Cuddy/Thirteen relationship; more in the sense of a teacher for Thirteen. More to come....


	10. Chapter 10

"How did you know that I had girl problems? Why not guy problems?" Thirteen inquired.

"I'm a very intuitive woman, who has been around the block. I could tell mainly by the way you dressed and carried yourself. You wear tight, dark colored jeans, but you let your belt hang from your waist. You wear black leather boots, but rarely with a skirt or a dress. You tend to wear bolder, darker colors instead of bright ones, and you generally always wear a t shirt with a nice sweater over top." Lena smiled,

"Uhm, I don't understand how that helps narrow it down, but continue." Thirteen rested her elbow on the back of the chair. Lena continued,

"I can also tell by the way you sit, and the way you allow the ladies to go first into the elevator, and how you hold the doors for them, but not the men."

Thirteen smirked,

"You make it sound so obvious."

Lena leaned back a little on her pillows,

"That's because when you've been with enough women, you tend to pick up on certain behaviors."

"Your chart said you were divorced. I take it the husband didn't like having to compete with other women?"

Lena shook her head,

"I couldn't keep pretending to be in love with him. As we got older, I was growing less and less satisfied with our marriage. He was an amazing man, but, he just didn't have the right stuff, you know what I mean?"

Thirteen laughed a bit,

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

The two women carried on light conversation until the rain had somewhat subsided and the sky was turning into a soft pink light. Thirteen glanced out the window, and then looked at her watch; she stood when she noticed the time,

"Lena, I've got to go. My shifts up, but can I stop by again tomorrow?"

Lena gave her a soft, maternal smile.

"Of course, darlin'. It was nice talking to someone who didn't see me strictly as a specimen, or a patient."

Thirteen smiled back,

"It was nice to talk to a woman who could make me feel good and not feel guilty." At those words, Thirteen's smile faded. Lena noticed this,

"I take it that other someone was the woman whose loss your carryin' on your shoulders?"

Thirteen nodded slightly. Lena gave her an understanding nod,

"For tomorrow." Thirteen smiled and walked out into the darkened, near empty hallway.

Once again, Lisa Cuddy found herself sitting in her office well past normal hours. She enjoyed her job, but sometimes enough was enough. She closed the manila folder and placed it in her desk drawer. She rose out of her chair, and proceeded to begin her 'heading home for the day' ritual. She went to the front of her desk and began placing a batch of folders that had been resting on her desk into the wide middle pocket of her briefcase. She was startled by a muffled knock at the door.

"Come in." she beckoned without bothering to turn around.

"Dr. House, if you honestly think that serenading me after hours with your annoying smart assed banter, then you are horribly mistaken." She said. The body behind her took a step closer,

"Hey, Lis." the voice said. Cuddy stood frozen as the voice grazed her ear.

"Dr. Hadley, if you need something, it will have to wait until tomorrow." She said in as solid of a tone as she could muster. She exhaled and turned around,

"What do you want, Remy?"

Thirteen took a step closer.

"I wanted to talk to you. Please?" her eyes seemed to plead and pull at Cuddy's heart. Reluctantly she nodded,

"Make it quick."

Cuddy continued to gather her things and place them in her suitcase. Thirteen began,

"I want to know why you haven't given me the chance to apologize. Why you don't even look at me anymore."

Cuddy turned and gave an annoyed grin,

"Well because you cheated on me, didn't tell me, treated me like shit until I found out, and lied to me. Does that sum it up?"

Thirteen's face began to crumble with guilt. Cuddy turned around, clasped her briefcase shut and continued over to get her coat. As she was putting her coat on, she felt a familiar hand slowly creep around her waist and the heat of a familiar form on her back. Her heart began to race.

"I want another chance. I can't go home tonight knowing that you and I can never be together again." Remy whispered in her ear, her lips grazing her earlobe. Cuddy's breath caught in her throat. Remy slowly placed her arms around to the lapels of Lisa's jacket and slowly pulled it off of her; kissing and caressing her neck and shoulders as the jacket fell.

The jacket hit the floor, and Remy's arms wrapped around Lisa's waist. Lisa began to melt into that comforting embrace that she had longed for. She slowly turned around, obviously succumbing to Remy's touch. She asked in a weak voice,

"Why do you do this to me…?" Remy smiled faintly as she leaned down began kissing Lisa's cheekbones. Remy then moved to envelope Lisa's lips in a deep and passionate kiss. Lisa's senses became heightened; she felt electrified at every touch and moaned as Remy's hands began slipping beneath her shirt.

At the contact of Lisa's bare skin, Remy felt sensation all over; she wanted, no, needed Lisa. The two slowly moved over to the couch; on the way, Remy shut off the desk light, completely darkening the room. When their journey finally lead them to the couch, Remy began unbuttoning Lisa's top. The black shirt became a mere puddle of fabric on the floor. As the shirt fell, Remy laid soft kisses down Lisa's stomach.

Lisa felt a burning sensation between her legs; she had missed Remy for so long. The trail of kisses lead Remy to the top button of Lisa's skirt. Remy slowly undid the button and allowed the skirt to drop. Lisa lay back on the couch, Remy's lips once again connected with hers. Remy's hands worked to remove layer after layer of Lisa's clothing….

Remy was awoken by a ray of sunlight grazing her eyelids. She took in her surroundings; wincing at the unfamiliarity. She felt a warm body lying upon hers. She carefully looked down and smiled when she took in the sight of a sleeping Lisa; her body laying across Thirteen's, a green blanket covering her near naked body. Her chest was slowly rising and falling with her breaths, and each breath grazed Thirteen's chest; Lisa's head resting on Thirteen's chest.

She carefully nudged Lisa out of her sweet slumber, and glanced down at her watch: five fifteen a.m. Lisa slightly stirred, and then slowly arose; taking in the surroundings. Suddenly, as if a spirit struck her, she immediately realized why a. she was only in her underwear, b. sleeping on Remy on a couch, and c. in her office. She quickly rose off the couch and began gathering together her things. Remy swung her legs around and began putting on her boots, all the while staring at Lisa. She began reminiscing, about how much she missed Lisa's touch, the feel of her skin; hell, the feel of Lisa's skin on her own. She knew, or at the very least, hoped that perhaps Lisa felt the same way. Her hurried actions and constant shaking of her head told Thirteen otherwise. Lisa began pulling her skirt past her waist; her eyes constantly avoiding Thirteen's. Thirteen grabbed her sweater, and Lisa's top, from the chair beside the couch. She began putting on her own sweater; when she peeked her head out, the sight that awaited her somewhat seemed to unsettle her. Lisa was turned around, her hands on her desk, her head hanging down. Thirteen got up and handed Lisa her shirt. Lisa remained turned around and took her shirt, slowly reapplying it to her person.

"What's wrong, Lisa?" Thirteen asked in a gentle tone.

"This. This is all wrong." Lisa muttered.

Lisa began putting her shoes back on,

"Why is this wrong?" Thirteen asked, stunned and somewhat hurt.

"Because you waltz in here; seemingly under the illusion that nothing happened. you barely say a word and seduce me into having reckless sex in my office. And you and I both know what's going to happen next. You're going to say that you didn't mean to do what you did, and that you miss me, and all that other b.s. that I am in no mood to hear. You took advantage of me."

Lisa walked to the her coat rack for her second attempt at going home. Thirteen followed closely,

"How did I take advantage of you? You weren't in any kind of emotional or physical distress when I came in here." she nearly shouted. Lisa then quickly turned around; and if Thirteen hadn't known any better, she would have thought that she saw tears beginning to well up in Lisa's emerald eyes,

"You took advantage of me because you knew how much I missed you; how much I still missed you! You knew that all it would take was just the slightest touch, and I would be all yours again. But I can't be yours all over again, because of what you did, and because of how you hid it from me."

Thirteen stood aghast, staring at the floor on the verge of a meltdown. Lisa tried to regain her composure,

"All you have ever given me are excuses. They aren't enough anymore…"

Thirteen opened her mouth to say something, but Lisa gently placed her fingers upon Thirteen's lips,

"…put yourself in my shoes." Thirteen's shame filled titanium eyes met Lisa's tearful, hurt filled green. Thirteen brought her hand to Lisa's cheek; gently brushing it with her thumb. Lisa closed her eyes and pulled away. Thirteen drew her hand back, and focused on every weighted word that fell from Lisa's lips. Lisa planted a small kiss on Thirteen's cheek. Lisa's swallowed back a sob,

"…think about what you did to me, Remy; I mean actually, consider what I'm going through…then we'll talk."

Lisa turned and walked out of her office into the darkened clinic, disappearing from Thirteen's sight. Thirteen stood back in the office, staring at the couch. Her apprehensions weren't completely incorrect. Lisa missed her so much, that it was hurting her just as much, if not more, than it was Thirteen. But her misjudged aspect, was that Lisa was not as ready to come back to her as she had hoped.

* * *

_**Hey guys! Sorry for the long hiatus. I'm getting back into the writing! There is a missing chapter between chapter seven and eight. I'll work on it and post it. It's gonna be a little bit before I can post more chapters! It's getting harder and harder to write! Please review!**_


	11. Chapter 11

When one spends the night on a couch in the office of their boss after a night of unbridled passion, then rises only to get into a massive heart ripping argument in the wee hours of the morning, the last thing one would hope to happen would be to wake up with a neck ache and back ache from sleeping on folded arms on the table in a break room. The only instance that could possibly make the situation worse, is if one spends the night on a couch in the office of their boss after a night of unbridled passion, gets into a massive argument, falls asleep on the table in the break room, and receives a special wake-up call from Dr. Gregory House.

House hobbled into the break room that morning slightly pitied the sight before him. Thirteen was sleeping; hunched over on her folded arms, her jacket acting as a pillow.

House merely tossed his cane on the table; inches away from her arms and took a seat at the head of the table. The loud clatter of the cane abruptly stirred Thirteen out of her sleep and quickly she opened her eyes; startled by the face of House staring back at her. He sarcastically wandered his eyes around the room,

"Let's see…Thirteen wakes up in the break room; wearing the same thing she was the day previous, Cuddy calls in sick; I'd say something a little more then occupational reviews went on last night." he inquired. Thirteen merely glared at him with weary eyes and stared at him as he continued,

"Not to mention the disaster area that once was Cuddy's office. I'm actually jealous. I don't even think I could do that much damage to her office; and you even had her body glued to your lips." House merely stared at the pitiful excuse that was Thirteen. Her hair was mussed, her eyes were weary and dark, and she couldn't even come up with a slight retort to ignite a trace of annoyance in the maze of arrogance that was Gregory House.

"What are you even doing here? You have absolutely no reason to be here. Go home. Shower. The putrid scent of after sex is nauseating."

Thirteen stood up, and then turned,

"Wait a minute, you have no reason to be here either. It's a Saturday, and we have no cases, except the normal rounds. Why are you here?" Thirteen questioned.

"I'm here," he started; staring at his cane,

"because I have a bizarre fascination with this whole situation. Wilson called me panicked, because Cuddy didn't get home last night. Friday night is his 'be a good friend so I don't go to hell' night, and Cuddy wasn't there for her surprise condition check."

Thirteen rolled her eyes, sighed, and turned to go outside, but was suddenly caught by House,

"You can't just expect things to be better in one night. Give her time. She'll realize that wasted sex with an employee of the same gender…is what she needs." House astounded Thirteen. She stood with her hand on the door,

"What she needs?"

House stood up and went to the coffee counter,

"In the five months that you were together, she was bubbly and annoying. Annoying, but happy. In the time I've known her, I have never seen her so pleased with herself and her relationship." A smiled began to appear on Thirteen's face. But House quickly snorted in retort,

"But when you cheated, lied, and hid it, you destroyed her; she was at an all time low. I guarantee you, if you think you can just win her back by useless, meaningless midnight lust in her office, then you are even worse than I originally anticipated you to be."

Thirteen sighed at the realization and began walking out the door. House shouted after her,

"And if next time you and Cuddy have sex, you see a little black lens and a red flashing light, just ignore it and act natural!"

Thirteen found herself once again at Lena's bedside; jotting down vitals on the clipboard. Lena's condition was stable, and she seemed stronger than the days before. As she rested, Thirteen stared at her and began wondering, again, if this was her in fifteen, ten, or five years. Would she end up alone, fading into oblivion? Thirteen took the clipboard to the nurses' station; when she returned, Lena was upright and awake. She smiled brightly and greeted Thirteen,

"Well if it isn't my favorite, strike that, _only_ tolerable member of the medical staff." Thirteen grinned,

"How you feeling today, Lena?" Thirteen asked. Lena eyed her up,

"You don't have a white jacket on; what are you asking me that for? It's your day off, isn't it?" she inquired.

Thirteen nodded and took a seat next to Lena,

"Yeah. I had some work to do here; it was a long night and I figured before I went home I'd come in and see how you were doing." Thirteen smiled. Lena cocked her eyebrow,

"So that's why you're wearing the same clothes as yesterday. _Long night_…"

Thirteen smirked and glanced down at her shoes,

"I'm betting you didn't even go home last night. Did this long night have anything to do with a certain woman of whom even the thought of her makes you walk and talk like you got your tail between your legs?"

Thirteen's face went pale,

"Am I that transparent? Or have you had House in here; dishing on all the gossip."

Lena smiled and leaned back,

"I just notice things."

Thirteen placed her clipboard on the end table and pulled a chair to Lena's bedside. She took a seat, eager to learn more about Lena.

"Lena, could I ask you a question?"

Lena nodded,

"Ask me anything you damn well please; talkin's doin' me some good."

"Why don't you have an emergency contact listed? Why hasn't anyone come to see you?"

Lena's smiled faded somewhat and she glanced out the window,

"I had a feeling you were gonna ask me something like that. In order to answer that question, I'd have to start a ways back, and I don't think your meager young ears should have to pray a pardon to that."

Thirteen smirked at the sudden pang of true southern jargon that appeared in Lena's voice.

"I've got time, Lena."

"I'll try to water it down a bit for you." Lena smiled, and began.

"Growing up deeply drenched in southern tradition and privilege does not guarantee much of a future. I was the youngest daughter of a wealthy tobacco tycoon. My other sisters had followed my parents legacy to the letter; cotillions, galas, and eventually, marry someone from another wealthy friend of the family. My two older sisters got the luck of the draw; they fell in love and stayed in love; one with a tradesman and the other with a cotton plantation owner.

When it was my turn, I was paired with a man named Brenton James Elderhardt. He was the most popular man in all of southern Louisiana. We dated, and at first, I felt the whole, 'new man jitters,' as we called them back then." Lena giggled; Thirteen imagined the scene Lena painted. Lena continued,

"We got engaged and married, and I was one of the wealthiest women in the entire South. I graduated top of my class at Vanderbilt, finished at law school, and became one of the most revered women in the country. But it never quite settled with me, the whole 'being a lawyer and married to a legacy' thing. Brenton was a fantastic man; kind, giving, tender. I just never truly fell in love with him. We had a trial separation, I went to Nashville, he remained in New Orleans. Then I met an amazing woman, named Jennifer Cresdon from Bluemont, Tennessee. Beautiful long blonde locks, deep pools of sapphire, fair skin; a truly exemplary specimen of a woman. I met her and it was immediate infatuation. For years, I spoke in subtle tones with her; careful not to overplay my hand. Finally, at the age of forty two I had a revelation. I was struck with thought that if I didn't follow my emotions, I would eventually lose Jenny. Then I finally mustered up the gall to ask her out on a date."

Thirteen was fascinated and leaning on her fist. Lena continued,

"We dated for a while, and eventually, we moved in together. A classic, middle-aged catharsis. That's what it seemed like to me anyway. Also, Brenton met another woman and we decided on a divorce. But the divorce didn't result in bitter feelings between Brenton and I. He and I just didn't communicate after the few weeks following the divorce. Jenny and I laughed together, talked together, grew together. But a few months later, I learned about my…condition."

Lena stared at her folded hands in her lap.

"It was then, that I decided that I would live vicariously. I would stay out late, drink, and dance with other women. Eventually, Jenny managed to cut me off at the pass; she told me it was a life with her, or a life without her. I, foolishly, decided the latter. Honey, now I'm alone and dying. My life is ending as an unfulfilled collection of nothing."

Thirteen stared at her hands; coming to the cold realization that Lena, however it disturbing it may be, _was Thirteen_.


	12. Chapter 12

The weeks went by, the weather began to sour, and slowly Lena's condition progressed for the worse. As each second ticked by, her body became more and more frail; her pain growing stronger and stronger. Every spare second she could muster, Thirteen spent at Lena's bedside. Conversing about the various ideas on their minds. With each story she told, and each piece of advice she gave, her voice grew weak.

This day was different. Thirteen arrived at work, later than usual, but when she stepped through the doors, a foreboding sensation overtook her. The sky had darkened early that day with fat, opaque black clouds that seemed to warn Thirteen of an oncoming storm. She stepped onto the elevator, rode to the second floor, got off. She went to her locker, put on her jacket, and continued to her rounds. Her first and foremost stop was Lena.

Thirteen entered the room; slightly startled by the presence of House and Foreman looking over her; House hunched on a stool, Foreman checking Lena's vitals. Foreman had a deep rooted sorrow in his eyes when he saw Thirteen. Foreman carefully placed an unconscious Lena's arm to rest across her chest. Foreman than walked over to Thirteen and shook his head,

"She's not gonna last much longer. I think you should say your farewells." Foreman laid a supporting hand on Thirteen's shoulder and then continued with his own rounds. Thirteen took up her vigil post at Lena's bedside, taking her frail, cold hand in her own, warm one.

House took in the sight and shook his head,

"Amazing, isn't it? One minute you are cheating on your significant other and the next moment you get a revelation in the form of a reflection of self lying on a hospital bed. She made a mistake, and is dying alone. Sound like a familiar scenario?"

Thirteen merely kept her gaze fixed on Lena. House rose off the stool and placed a supporting hand upon Thirteen's back. Surprised at the sudden affection, Thirteen merely looked up at him. He drew his hand back and began walking out,

"Take this as a sign. You can change today, so you don't end up with the same tomorrow as she had."

Thirteen stared at the floor a moment; House's words echoing in her mind. She quickly returned her gaze to Lena. Lena was sedated and had an oxygen mask across her mouth. Thirteen began stroking Lena's hand,

"Lena, I know the sedatives Dr. Foreman gave you are strong, but I'm pretty sure you can still hear me. I want to thank you for what you've done. You helped me realize what a juvenile and conceited mistake I had made. The stories you told me spoke volumes. I understand that you saw my pain, and you told me of yours, so I wouldn't end up in the lonely state you're in now."

Thirteen brushed a stray strand of hair from Lena's face,

"…you've done more for me…than you'll ever know. You gave me wisdom. I'll never be able to thank you enough." Tears began streaming down Thirteen's cheeks as she sat in silence, staring at the pale, fragile woman lying on the hospital bed. She looked so much smaller than she had before; she looked, breakable.

Thirteen rose out of her chair and made her way towards the door. She took a final glance back, and walked out into the busy hallway. Thirteen went into the break room and took a small nap on the couch…

_The machine's began beeping loudly; various alerts clouded the one silent atmosphere in the room. Nurses and doctors flooded the room,_

_"She's crashing! We need a crash cart stat!" Foreman ran into the patient's room, trying to aide the dying woman.  
_

Lisa strode into the break room, taking notice of the sleeping Thirteen. She quietly walked over to the couch and stared at the peaceful, sleeping woman. A smile grew across her face when she observed the small twitching of Thirteen's smile as she entered her own small piece of solitude.

_"Hang on, girl, hang on." Foreman chanted as the nurse next to him charged the paddles and he defibrillated her, all the while, in the back of his mind, he was fully aware that his attempts were more than likely futile. After various charges to Lena's stopped heart, Foreman and the other members of the medical staff felt the defeat of losing another human life. Foreman turned off the various machines, and took one final look at Lena. He took a second glance, and upon further inspection, he saw a faint smile across her lips. Lena entered her own piece of solitude._

Hours later, Thirteen awoke, unaware of the events that had taken place during her slumber. She slowly rose and made her way towards the room which she had come to spend so much time in before. She caught sight of the room, and froze in her steps.

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There will most likely be more chapters before this one. These first posts are rough drafts! Sorry for the hiatus! Reviews are more than welcomed!


	13. Chapter 13

Thirteen's eyes were fixed on the now empty bed in the patient's room. The nurses had begun removing all the equipment they had used to try to revive Lena; futile attempts to prolong the inevitable. Lena Elderhardt had died a lonely woman. She had lost her only love due to ignorance, and self pity. She was a relatively young woman; one who was still connected with the emotions and confusion of her younger years. She died at the age of fifty three, some twenty years older than Thirteen. As she watched Lena deteriorate, and listened to her wise words, she soon realized that in a matter of time, Thirteen will be that woman at the rate she was going.

The window beyond the bed showed a scene of depression; the rain was coming down in sheets. The sun was going down; the sky was tinted with a deep gray cascade of clouds. This tore Thirteen into a deeper state of sadness. She slowly turned and made her way to the locker room.

The other people in the hallway seemed to be mere blurs that glided past her. She was in a daze; Foreman and Kutner said their good byes, but they did not seem to register in Thirteen's mind.

As she entered the empty, darkened locker room, she collapsed on the bench in sobs. Torturing herself, she began to open the old scars that hadn't even begun to heal. Her heart bled, for so many things: for her illness, for Lena's death, for what Lena had said to her, and how it made her think of what an ass she had been; for Lisa. For how much she missed her.

She wiped the tears that had been dripping from her face, grabbed her keys, and headed for her car.

The various scenes passed outside of the driver's side window. She paid them no attention. She stared at the bright blue numbers staring at her from the dashboard: 10:34 P.M. '_She's still up'_ she thought. She reached the suburban neighborhood and drove past house after house with the lights off, praying that she'd still be awake. Amends, that's what she needed. She was going to finally make amends.

She reached the familiar house which Thirteen hadn't stepped foot near for well over two months. She turned off the ignition and stared out the rain speckled window. She contemplated for a moment, and then quietly, slowly, she opened the door. Her feet felt like lead, as though she was making her way to Lisa's front door for their first date. She reached the dark front porch and knocked on the door.

After a brief moment, the porch light enlightened Thirteen's tear stained face. She heard the clicks of the lock on Lisa's door; the door swung open. Lisa took in the sight of a clearly distraught Thirteen. She had never seen Remy like this. She stepped outside, confused, and looked into Thirteen's tearful titanium eyes,

"Rem? W-Why are y-" she began, but was soon interrupted by Thirteen's arms wrapping around her waist in a strong embrace, and pulling her into a deep, powerful kiss. Suddenly, Lisa melted at Remy's touch. It felt comfortable; amazing. It felt genuine, compassionate; like it had before. The women shifted in each other's arms. Remy slid her hands up and underneath the fabric of Lisa's t shirt. Cuddy slowly backed up into the doorway, hoping Remy would follow her lead. Their lips in constant contact, they made their way to Lisa's front hallway. Remy gently pushed the door shut behind her. They slowly pulled apart, Lisa remaining in Remy's protective arms. Lisa rested her forehead on Remy's lips; Remy gently kissed Lisa's forehead. Remy ran her hands in lazy lines up and down Lisa's spine. Lisa tilted her chin to look into Remy's eyes; what she saw astounded her. She saw the deep scars of a loss, and she saw genuine attentiveness and longing; she saw the woman who had temporarily left her two months previous. Lisa placed her hands softly on either side of Remy's face; her pale green eyes seemed to bode, "talk to me."

Remy wrapped her arms tightly around Lisa's waist and hid her face in Lisa's neck. She began to sob again, thinking back on the recent loss of her friend Lena. As the sobs wracked her body, Lisa placed her hand gently on the back of Remy's neck and began caressing with her thumb.

Remy's body shook as she sobbed,

"I'm never going to let you go, Lisa Cuddy. Not as long as I live…."

Tears began falling down Lisa's cheeks as well. Thirteen's words carried immense weight; from the fighting, to the separation. Now, all Lisa wanted to do was hold Remy and never let her go.

"You don't ever have to let go...never, Remy."

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If this chapter doesn't make you cry...more to come. PROMISE! :-)


	14. Chapter 14

The fire had been lit as a last resort; an Atlantic thunderstorm had made its way up the east coast of the continent, showering the rooftops, streets, and lawns with much needed rain. Lightning illuminated the dark night sky, beckoning the thunder to show its might and, not to be outdone, the tumultuous thunder responded, bellowing out across the city. For some reason, whether it was by sheer luck or by the fates conspiring in her favor, the transformers that supplied Lisa's home with light had been struck by lightning, causing her home to become blanketed in darkness.

The yellow light from the candles and fire danced across Lisa's living room, causing shadows to grow and shrink, and the taps of heavy raindrops created a romantically soothing ambience; one of somberness. The deep crimson shade of the chilled wine glowed against the fire, the crackling and popping of the fire, all conspired to ease Remy's state of turmoil, but she remained untouched by the ambience.

Lisa sat on the couch, her knees tucked beneath her, with a steadying arm around Remy. The dancing flames of the fireplace had captured Remy's attention, and Lisa observed the yellow embers playing against Remy's titanium eyes. Remy remained silent and listless, sipping at the wine in her glass; her mind still racing from the events previous. Lisa merely sat next to her in supportive silence, every now and then stroking the back of Remy's neck to assure her that she was ready to listen. As if beckoned by some silent force, Remy set her wine glass down on the coffee table and reclined back on the couch, yet again. She mentally combed her vocabulary, trying to form the best combination of syllables in order to fully illustrate what was going on in her head. With no avail, she decided to break the silence,

"I used to hate thunderstorms."

Lisa sat upright, smiling slightly at the words that had just been uttered from Remy's mouth,

"You used to…hate thunderstorms?" she asked, trying to clarify what Remy had just said. Remy nodded slowly, and a small smirk played across her lips,

"When I was younger, I used to absolutely despise thunderstorms. When I heard that first clap of thunder, I ran to my room, slammed the door, and hid beneath my bed with all of my stuffed animals. I'd stick them in rows around me to guard me from the loud noises, the thunder, and whatnot. And I had this little tiger flashlight, so when the power went out, I still had that light in my fort."

Remy paused slightly and laughed,

"…I used to be so afraid of coming out of that little fort; I was too afraid of facing the wind, and the rain…then the Huntington's became prominent in my mom, and I hid again. I used to be so ashamed of myself when I found myself hiding under that bed; trying to build up a barrier between myself and the outside world. Here I am now, twenty-some years later, and I'm still hiding underneath the bed."

Lisa placed her wine glass beside Remy's on the coffee table and brushed a stray strand of hair from Remy's cheek,

"What makes you think that you're hiding beneath the bed?" Lisa asked.

The younger woman swallowed back the last of the wine that remained in her glass and stared at the empty flute,

"Rather than being up front with you about what I had done, I let you find out the worst way possible. Rather than telling Jetta off, I just tried to ignore her. Rather than going home and dealing with a loss like a big girl, and came to my ex-girlfriend's house acting like a blubbering mess."

Remy's eyes met Lisa's, and soon, the walls came down,

"Lis…I don't know why carried on the way I did. I had everything, a-and I just…let my old habits emerge…"

Remy took Lisa's hand,

"I was an idiot. I know what I did was wrong, but I-"

Lisa placed her hand over Remy's lips, who melted at the touch. She had missed that familiar touch, the scent of Lisa's skin, the feel.

"I know you're sorry. But I don't want to hear it. I just want to focus on tomorrow, not yesterday." Lisa stated wisely.

Remy brought a soft hand to Lisa's cheek, Lisa closed her eyes as she tried to suppress the tears beginning to appear,

"I had everything I could possibly ever want with you. I love you, and no one else."

Remy placed her arm around Lisa, who curled up into Remy's embrace. Lisa draped her arm across Remy's chest, drawing lazy circles on her shoulder. Remy dragged her fingers lightly back and forth on Lisa's arm, refusing to let exhausting take over her. The pair focused once again on the crackling fireplace. Remy exhaled deeply,

"I can't go to Lena's funeral." She stated blankly. Lisa rose from her position with a concerned expression cast across her features,

"Why?"

"I saw something in Lena that I have never seen in anyone before…"

Lisa's attention was immediately aroused,

"What?"

Remy's voice began to crack with unshed tears,

"…myself."

Lisa dragged her fingers lazily through Remy's hair.

"…she was the woman I was going to be years from now. The casual sex, the disappointment of loved ones, the careless attitude; I'm gonna be her. Dying alone."

The last words that escaped Remy's lips seemed to hang in the air for a few moments. The rain drops fell heavier and harder, the sound becoming the only barrier between the loss of Remy's composure. Lisa took Remy's soft face in her hands, guiding her attention towards her own green eyes,

"You have the opportunity now to repel that possibility of becoming who Lena was. And by the way,"

Lisa placed a chaste kiss upon Remy's lips,

"…you're not alone."

At that same moment, the room became illuminated once again as the electricity flowed through the house. Slightly disappointed, Remy exhaled,

"I guess I better head home…" she sighed. She began to rise off of the couch when a soft hand gripping her own prevented further movement. Remy held still as Lisa went around the living room, shutting off the lights once again, and reached for the stereo remote off of the coffee table. At the click of a button, the dark room, quiet room filled with the soft sounds of Ella Fitzgerald, singing the classic, "These Foolish Things." Lisa softly placed the remote back on the coffee table, and scooted towards the opposite wall, creating a mini dance floor in the middle of her living room. Remy grinned and once again took Lisa's hand,

"Would you like to dance?" she whispered inches away from Lisa's ear.

Without a word, Lisa and Remy connected on the hardwood floor, swaying quietly back and forth into the stormy night.

* * *

There is much more to come.....I apologize for the hiatus. High school....


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